After speaking with thousands of real estate agents over the past five years, I’ve noticed a common challenge among investors: many find it intimidating and difficult to communicate effectively with agents.

If you’re struggling to build rapport with real estate agents or feel like you’re not getting the best deals, this guide will help you transform those conversations and negotiate better property purchases.

Why Building Rapport with Real Estate Agents Matters

Before diving into the tactics, let’s understand the fundamental reason why rapport matters: you want the agent working for you, not just the vendor.

While agents technically represent the seller, when they like you and see you as someone easy to deal with, they’re more likely to:

• Share insider information about what the vendor really wants
• Advocate for your offer during negotiations
• Give you insights that other buyers might miss

The best time to negotiate isn’t just at the offer stage—it’s from the very first phone call.

1. Start with Light Humour and Compliments

When I call an agent, I always do a bit of due diligence first. I’ll check Trade Me or other online platforms to see how many listings they have. If they’ve got multiple properties, that’s a sign they’re successful and in demand.

Here’s how I use this information:

Instead of: “Hi, I’m calling about your listing at 123 Main Street.”

Try this:

• “Hi, my name’s Tama. How’s it going today?”
• Wait for their response
• “I’m calling about one of your listings.”
• When they ask “Which one?” add a quick quip: “It’s good to see you’ve got more than one listing, unlike other agents in this market!”

This 2-3 second joke before getting down to business can really go a long way. It shows you’ve done your homework and sets a positive, friendly tone.

2. Avoid Direct Accusations About the Listing

One of the biggest mistakes investors make is inadvertently insulting the agent’s competence.

Never say: “Why hasn’t this property sold yet?”

This insinuates the agent is useless at their job and immediately puts up barriers.

Instead, ask: “I can see it’s been listed since July. Have there been a few offers on the property that may have fallen over, or what’s been the activity around the property since then?”

This approach shows genuine interest without placing blame, keeping the conversation collaborative rather than confrontational.

3. Position Yourself as a Serious Buyer

Certain questions trigger a subconscious response in agents that you’re a legitimate, serious buyer. Here’s a powerful framework I use:

“Look, I’m trying to do a property flip and get a good deal that will safeguard me on the sale. I really need a good agent on the other end.”

Then add this game-changing line:

“I want to buy the house, add value to it, and possibly give it back to you when I go to sell it.”

Suddenly, the agent’s brain starts calculating: they might get paid twice from this one transaction. This creates a powerful incentive for them to work harder on your behalf.

4. Show Empathy Toward the Vendor’s Situation

Agents are often good friends with their vendors—sometimes they’ve known them for decades or even sold them the property originally. In smaller towns like Invercargill, agents who’ve been in the business for 10-15 years likely know everyone.

Ask empathetically: “What’s the reason the vendor wants to sell? Is there anything we can include in our offer to make it easier on them?”

When you show genuine care for the vendor’s situation, the agent doesn’t have to fabricate reasons to present your offer favorably. They can authentically tell the vendor, “This buyer is really trying to make this work for you.”

5. Master the Art of Communication Efficiency

Here’s something most people won’t talk about: the worst thing when dealing with agents is they simply don’t answer the phone.

You’re calling multiple agents, leaving voicemails, and not getting callbacks. Here’s the solution:

Send a text message first: “Hi [Agent Name], calling about [property address]. Is this still available for sale?”

Then wait for them to call you back. If they respond quickly, chances are the property is still available.

Agents love this approach because they get missed calls from unknown numbers constantly. This simple courtesy and efficiency makes you stand out as someone professional and respectful of their time.

6. Protect Yourself from Multi-Offer Games

Unfortunately, there are some bad apples out there. Some agents will take your offer, stall it, and try to create a multi-offer situation in the background.

Here’s how to address this using third-party blame:

“Look, I’ve dealt with other agents before where they received my offer and didn’t present it to the vendor—they tried to get a multi-offer going. This isn’t something you’re going to do, right?”

Say it with a slight laugh, like you’re sharing an inside joke. They’ll likely respond, “No, no, no, of course not.”

Then ask: “Cool. So when can I expect you to present the offer to the vendor?”

Get a specific deadline.

7. Control the Offer Presentation Process

Don’t just hand over your offer and hope for the best. Ask:

“When you present this to the vendor, how are you doing that?”

• If they say “in person,” they could potentially delay it
• If they say “I’ll email it to them,” follow up with: “So I could potentially get a response in half an hour then?”

This catches them if they’re planning to stall. They might say, “Well, they’re still at work,” which gives you real information.

Then request: “Could you also follow up with a phone call after sending the email?”

In today’s property market, getting the best deals comes through speed and efficiency. The agent is the gatekeeper, and you need to coach them on what you want them to do.

Summary: Your Agent Communication Checklist

To become someone agents want to work with:

• ✅ Do your research before calling
• ✅ Start with light humor or compliments
• ✅ Avoid direct accusations about listing performance
• ✅ Position yourself as a serious buyer with repeat business potential
• ✅ Show empathy toward the vendor’s situation
• ✅ Use text messages to initiate contact efficiently
• ✅ Use third-party blame to prevent multi-offer games
• ✅ Control the offer presentation timeline

Remember, agents encounter difficult, demanding buyers all the time. When you come across as professional, courteous, and genuinely interested in creating a win-win situation, you’ll stand out from the crowd and secure better deals.

Ready to Fast-Track Your Property Investing Success?

If you don’t have the time or energy to master these rapport-building techniques on your own, my team and I work directly with investors to source deals throughout New Zealand.

We can go over deals that other investors are buying and connect you with our deal sources who specialize in finding properties for investors.

Book a free 15-minute call with me—no obligation—and we can discuss how to accelerate your property investing journey